The Psychology Behind “You Become What You Think”
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The Psychology Behind “You Become What You Think”

the-psychology-behind-you-become-what-you-think

Our thoughts, whether dominated by love, hate or even if it’s a mix of complex emotions, act as the building blocks of our identity. This is not just some philosophical postulation; a plethora of psychological theories and neuroscientific facts back it up. From carving our view of the world to moulding the very structure of our brain, what we think has an impact on who we are and what we become.

The Power of Thoughts: Love and Hate

The Constructive Force of Love

Love, whether with a person, a hobby, or an idea, is a major changing force. Psychological aspects show that love involves attachment, admiration, and a deep sense of connection. Love can evoke our brain’s reward system, it unlocks it mostly via dopamine and oxytocin release. Dopamine brings out motivation and happiness via pleasure, while oxytocin can strengthen bonds and build trust in the system. These neurochemical reward behaviors are associated with what we love, and encourage us to spend more time and energy on those fronts.

For example, if there’s an individual who’s deeply passionate about art may spend most of his time perfecting their craft. Their focus and practice not only sharpen their skill but also rewire their brain through neuroplasticity, which is the ability of our brain to adapt and reorganize itself. Over time, their personality becomes intertwined with their passion and they show the qualities and mindset of an artist.

The Destructive Influence of Hate

Hate, on the other hand, is seemingly the opposite of love, it functions and works on a similar, intense emotional plane. It often arises from fear, anger, or perceived threats. Neurologically, hate activates the amygdala, which is the brain’s centre for processing emotions and detecting threats, as well as regions that are associated with aggression and decision-making, such as the prefrontal cortex and insula.

Unlike love, which promotes growth and connection. Fixating hate for anything, be it a person, a thing, or an idea that encourages growth and connection, hate can create a feedback loop of negativity, making it more ingrained over time. Interestingly, this fixation can also lead to unintended mimicry. Sigmund Freud gave the concept of reaction formation, which suggests that individuals who show behaviours opposite to what they consciously hate as a way to keep a façade for unconscious identification with those traits. For Example, someone who criticizes a particular ideology so intensely might covertly fear or resonate with a few aspects of it, which creates internal conflicts that shape their personality.

Love and Hate in the Brain

Our Brain barely registers Love and Hate as emotions abstractly, it physically adapts and changes based on the thoughts that might emerge from these emotions.

The Neurobiology of Love
  • Reward Pathway Activation: Love activates the ventral tegmental area (VTA), a dopaminergic area in the brain linked to reward and motivation. This explains why simply thinking about or engaging with something we love proves somewhat rewarding.
  • Oxytocin Release: The “love hormone,” oxytocin, plays an important role in building and forming emotional bonds and facilitating trust. Studies show that those with a high level of oxytocin have closer emotional attachments with loved ones or are some of the people who enjoy certain activities they cherish.
  • Neuroplasticity: Focusing on love over and over again strengthens synaptic connections in the brain, especially in regard to those areas associated with positive reinforcement and long-term memory. After some time, these neural patterns become hardwired, thus making these passions a part of who we are.
The Neurobiology of Hate
  • Amygdala Hyperactivation: Hatred activates the amygdala in human beings preparing the brain and body for a fight-or-flight response and making things worse for them to remain angry and fearful at a later time.
  • Overlap With Love: Both love and hatred interestingly activate similar areas of the brain, such as the putamen and insula. In this way, a shared type of neural circuit accompanies both emotions and explains why very strong emotions generally overlap in the space between love and hate.
  • Cognitive Rigidity: Exposure to hateful thoughts for a long time causes an irreversible reduction of cognitive flexibility of the brain, more accessibility towards biased thought processing, and less receptivity to other individual’s viewpoints.

Cognitive and Behavioral Phenomena

Cognitive Dissonance

This phenomenon was first introduced by Leon Festinger as cognitive dissonance. It refers to the dissonance that arises when conflicting beliefs and behaviours are present. Such a situation may arise, for example, in the case of a person who really values kindness and yet has hate-filled thoughts about someone. They will experience internal tension. To solve this tension, they might rationalize their hatred or try to lessen it, thus affecting their course of action and identity.

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

The beliefs we hold about something shape our expectations of it, and those expectations lead to action. The very act of assuming something causes it to turn into fact, the self-fulfilling prophecy is simply one manifestation of the way such beliefs, either positive or negative, eventually become reality. For example, if someone thinks they cannot succeed, they will unconsciously ruin their chance of success, thereby fulfilling their belief by reinforcing their initial thought.

Mirror Neurons and Mimicry

Found in the premotor cortex, mirror neurons are involved in critical functions in empathy and imitation. These neurons respond when we see others act just as if we were doing it ourselves. This ability enables us to understand and replicate behaviours. This mechanism explains how certain environmental settings or even individuals can truly mould our characteristics far down into what can be hate or love.

The Phenomenon of Pet Owners Resembling Their Pets

There’s a very peculiar yet common phenomenon that exists, and that is owning a pet which creates an image that resonates within the owner. While this might seem anecdotal, psychological and biological theories provide better explanations for this phenomenon.

Psychological Explanations
  • Mere Exposure Effect: By Robert Zajonc, this term means that anything very familiar would lead to a liking attitude. This can happen unconsciously done, pet owners would start choosing a pet similar to them simply because they are constantly observing it, which would become “familiar” and hence comforting and “likeable”.
  • Self-Concept and Identity: Pets are often extensions of their owner’s identity, thus, by selecting very similar kinds of characteristic pets, an individual reinforces their sense of self.
Biological and Behavioral Links
  • Shared Environment: Common living invites similar habits and behaviours to both people and their pet owners alike, for example, instance, a lazy owner soon over the period becomes fat with their pet.
  • Imitative Bonding: Often a pet mimics its owner’s facial expressions and behaviors creating a visual resemblance. Over time this mirroring grows into a deeper attachment, which eventually leads to the pet and the owner being more like each other.

The Role of Identity Formation and Psychological Theories

Freud’s Psychoanalytic Perspective

Sigmund Freud emphasized the influence of the theory of the unconscious mind on behaviour. According to Freud, suppressed emotions, whether love, hate, or any other emotion, can be manifested in unexpected ways. A person who represses jealousy, for instance, will overcompensate by excessively admiring or criticizing the object of their envy, ultimately adopting traits they once did not like at all.

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs

Abraham Maslow describes the theory of self-actualization as the feeling that guides our thoughts toward actualizing our potential. Thoughts of Love and fulfilment thrust us toward growth, creativity, and a purpose in life. On the contrary, Hate and negativity can sap us out by imprisoning an individual at the lower levels of the hierarchy such as safety and security concerns

Bandura’s Social Learning Theory

It was Albert Bandura who proposed the theory that we learn our behaviours by observing and imitating others around us. This theory thus emphasizes the truth about the point on which we focus whether a person is the object of admiration or dislike since both may influence our actions. Fixations on traits admired transform into personal growth, while fixations on negative characteristics risk adopting them inadvertently.

Practical Implications

Understanding the psychology behind “You become what you think” acts as a helpful thought pattern for personal growth and emotional well-being.

Mindfulness Practices

Mindfulness will help individuals become aware of their thoughts without incorporating judgment in their behaviour. Once an individual understands their behaviour they can redirect negative thought patterns which creates an emotional balance and builds resilience.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

CBT helps to reformulate harmful thought processes in the mind into as healthy as possible. Moreover, it replaces irrational beliefs with constructive alternatives thereby empowering people to take charge of their mental and emotional wellness.

Gratitude and Positivity

Gratitude rewires the reward system of the brain, so it increases the feeling of contentment and reduces the impact of negativity. If one practices gratitude regularly, their thinking is changed from hate to love, thereby becoming healthier in developing one’s identity.

Conclusion

The interplay between love, hate, and thoughts shows the profound influence our mental processes have on our identity. The formation of thoughts, through the neurochemical rewards of love or the destructiveness of hate, makes people what they are. Even in seemingly lighthearted phenomena like pet owners resembling their pets, we see the intricate ways our minds and behaviours align. Understanding the psychology and neurology of this phenomenon grants humanity the skills to deliberately construct thought patterns that nurture growth and fulfilment. It is a lesson to be mindful of what you think, and who you want to be.

References +
  • Bandura, A. (1977). Social Learning Theory. Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice Hall.
  • Festinger, L. (1957). A Theory of Cognitive Dissonance. Stanford University Press.
  • Zajonc, R. B. (1968). “Attitudinal Effects of Mere Exposure.” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 9(2), 1-27.
  • Maslow, A. H. (1943). “A Theory of Human Motivation.” Psychological Review, 50(4), 370-396.
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