Passive Aggressive Behaviour in the Workplace

We have all gotten at least one infuriating backhanded compliment in our lives. The sarcastic snicker as they look at their friends before turning to you. The obvious disrespect that they did not even try to hide. We have all been there. However, despite the urge to smack that smile off their face, most of the time we end up enduring it with a smile. Workplace environments are no strangers to passive-aggressive behaviour. It may be our colleague, or sometimes our boss, an even more difficult situation that forces us to ignore the toxicity. Passive aggressive behaviour in the workplace is definitely not a fun ride to bear through. The slowly brewing poison inside everybody’s heart eventually becomes hard to ignore. Eventually, our workplace ends up feeling like a nuclear field with no fresh air to pass around.

What Is Passive Aggressive Behaviour?

We can all recall moments in our lives where even sometimes our friends or family displayed oh-so-accidental behaviour which was not so accidental at all. Did this trigger some awful memories? Probably yes. Passive Aggressive behaviour is often defined as deliberate behaviour that may seem like accidental or neutral (American Psychological Association, 2018). However, in reality, it is a hidden display of aggression. A compliment that is actually a jab. Or maybe a scene common in movies- an accidental trip. These were just some examples that we can easily point out. However, passive-aggressive behaviour is not always this easy to uncover. It often comes out as innocent behaviour and before you understand it, the damage would have already been done. It is an indirect form of aggression, which can be, at times, even scarier than confrontational aggression.

Read More: Passive Aggression Behavior – A Obstruction in Relationships Growth

Signs Of Passive Aggressive Behaviour:

Due to its indirect nature, passive-aggressive behaviour can be sometimes hard to pinpoint. Here are some subtle signs that you are actually being subjected to passive aggressiveness:

• They Deny Anger: A passive-aggressive person will never admit that they are upset or angry. Instead, they will display discreet hostile behaviour that is not confrontational in behaviour. For example, they will randomly bring up a mistake from the past that they claimed to have not bothered them deliberately when your boss is talking about a new project.
• Sulky Behaviour: They will never admit that they have a problem with someone when confronted. They will just behave like a sulky child. Unfortunately, they do not sulk in silence. They will ensure that their discontent is brought to notice through sighs and pouts.
• They Always Give “Compliments”: Sounds sweet no? Unfortunately, these are not the sweet compliments that bring a smile to our faces. Instead, they are backhanded compliments that are actually an indirect insult disguised as a compliment. For example, “Oh, I am surprised that you finished the project assigned” or “Wow, you came on time, a pleasant surprise”.
• They Don’t Follow Through: They will take on tasks that they are unhappy with and then will deliberately not complete those tasks on time as a silent resistance. They will procrastinate on tasks given by you followed by a denial of their behaviour (Epstein, 2021).
• Will Talk But To Others: They will not communicate their problem to you and instead talk it out with an uninvolved party. If they are not satisfied with your work instead of telling you what is wrong, they might go talk to HR, or spread rumours about your quality of work.

Consequences Of Passive Aggressive Behaviour In The Workplace:

As soon as an organization allows passive-aggressive behaviour to form a nest in its roots, the culture of that workplace takes a turn for the worse. Passive aggressive behaviour completely ruins the workplace, making the place unbreathable for their employees, eventually affecting their productivity. Unfortunately, sometimes passive-aggressive behaviour can be rewarded due to the negligence of management. It is easy to imagine the conclusion of such negligence – more and more employees feel compelled to give up hard work and instead engage in similar behaviour.

Read More: Toxic Workplaces: Signs, Impact and Solution

This serves as a poison that completely ruins an organization from within. Coworkers don’t feel confident enough to trust each other, always trying to one-up the other. It destroys the morals of employees who feel that putting in dedication and hard work is useless in this organization. Workers who join the company filled with enthusiasm soon shift their attitudes as they start working only for paychecks (Anderson, 2013).

Eventually, this behaviour starts impacting the clients who lost interest in the organization moving on to find another organization that is not yet a victim to toxicity. While the client loses interest the employees remain busy blaming others and avoiding responsibility. This is how the story of many once great organizations eventually ends as it gets engulfed in animosity and poison.

Read More: The Role of Emotional Intelligence in Leadership, According to Psychology

How To Deal With A Passive Aggressive Coworker:

It can be frustrating and defeating dealing with a passive aggressive coworker who is ought for you. Here are some strategies to deal with a passive aggressive coworker:

• Discover The Root Cause: When someone behaves passive-aggressively but insists that they are “fine,” don’t just take their word for it. Instead try digging deeper by asking questions that will help you uncover the true issue the door problem. Allow them to explain themselves, but ensure they don’t shift the blame onto someone else.
• Remain Composed: Responding back emotionally and aggressively to a passive-aggressive team member may actually worsen the situation and escalate it. They might feel threatened and withdraw further, becoming even more set in their behavior.
• Choose Your Words Wisely: Provide clear and concise feedback and remember to be mindful of your language. For example, instead of saying that someone is “always” late, try talking it out by recalling specific instances from the past week. This gives them a chance to explain and reinforces the need for punctuality.
• Establish Clear Expectations And Consequences: If a team member avoids taking accountability by putting the blame on your standards being too high or that they were unaware of your expectations get the attention back to the main conversation. Often passive aggressive individuals try directing the attention away from the situation to avoid confrontation. Convey your standards clearly and remind them of the consequences to avoid confusion.
• Foster Open Communication: Passive-aggressive individuals often struggle with expressing their emotions openly and prefer more indirect forms of communication like emails. Encourage them to build the communication skills and confidence to address issues directly in person.

Passive aggressive behaviour spreads as fast as a forest fire, making it extremely important to resolve it at the first sign of distress. However, it is not just about simply avoiding conflicts. Instead, it is about creating a healthy environment where trust, companionship and a will to work hard can flourish. It is extremely important for all leaders and managers to continuously look out for the signs of it and take active steps to stop it from spreading around.

Start by evaluating your organization’s communication practices and work culture judging how employees engage with each other. Encourage honesty, providing necessary resources and training to equip your team with tools to handle conflicts constructively. By taking such steps, you can transform your workplace into a thriving, supportive environment where every employee can flourish and feel motivated to do their best.

Read More: The Psychology of Toxic Leaders

FAQs

1. Is passive-aggressive bad in the workplace?

When a workplace allows passive aggressiveness to develop it serves as the backdrop of unhealthy competition with employees trying to elevate one worker at the cost of another. There may be times when such behaviour is seen as a sign of ambition, but it is toxic and can derail projects and cohesion.

2. What are the negative effects of passive-aggressive behaviours?

Passive-aggressive behaviour can be intensely frustrating for the victim because it can be hard to identify, difficult to prove and can be unintentional as well. It can lead to conflict and hostility due to them not communicating directly about the problem at hand.

3. How to stop passive-aggressive behaviour at work?

The first step is to understand why passive-aggressive behaviour is present. Avoid feeding into it and model assertiveness. Enforce consequences if the behaviour doesn’t stop and make sure to practice self-care to avoid exhaustion from experiencing a toxic situation.

4. Why is passive-aggressive behaviour toxic?

Passive-aggressive people never admit that they are upset, angry or unsatisfied. Instead, they don’t admit and speak out what they are thinking which can be confusing and frustrating for the person on the receiving end. Especially when they lash out in indirect and puzzling ways.