Today, all of us look around for some or the other kind of validation. But, does the hunger for validation from people who are not even concerned about us important? More importantly, does that form of validation lead us to our mental peace? The kind of world we live in has made us enslaved to a big number of aspects. Which mainly deal in the how laid back a human can be made. It is an evident fact that all of us have become stuck to our workplace seats. Ever since the completion of usage of machines, like computers and mobile phones came into existence. While on one hand, it is a necessity of the new age of human evolution.
On the other, it is a big liability that we have created for ourselves. This is simply because of the kind of advancements that have come with the passing time. That has made it tedious for us to survive in this world. Even though we strive to do the deepest and most painful of efforts to achieve our goals.
Social media’s debut brought up a whole new set of issues for all of us. Social media was first developed to link individuals in various regions. However, as technology grew, there was a requirement for increasingly sophisticated apps that catered to humans’ growing smartphone needs. The aetiology of the word “connection” was altered by these applications, which intensified every facet of communication. This resulted in several issues with both physical and mental health. Before, interacting with others was a gift that nobody could have ever imagined.
The kind of applications we have today have made it more than difficult for a human to survive in this world today. We see Instagram, where people follow each other to connect, and are, likewise, “supposed” to keep their profiles updated. People have made it a platform to put their content, pictures, writings and no matter what in creative terms. Then, “expect” their audiences to like it as much as possible. When we must uphold particular norms and are concerned that we could fall short of them. We use the phrase “expectation.” This is where the misery of this externally beautiful world of social media starts.
The people who would assess them would be their audiences. This is where everything becomes life-altering for all of us and makes it difficult for such young minds to survive. If I ask you to appear for an exam a month later alongside 100 others of your age and intellect. That would be based on a field that you are currently engaged yourself in. Then, what kind of unconscious expectations would you set up for yourself?
You would have a benchmark in mind that I need to be the best. You would work towards being the best out of those competing. Since that is the unconscious expectation that I have set for you when I told you about the test you have to take. Similarly, the expectations for a person entering these social media platforms are set by the audience and the people who are the ones being catered to. As the content being produced and shared every minute and every second on these platforms. To go on with this, I would like you to pause for a minute and read a saying that I quote below.
The sun, the moon and the stars would have disappeared long ago… had they happened to be within the reach of predatory human hands.
Just recall all the situations in which you have made a choice to seek validation from someone. It is plausible that you might have taken such an approach many-a-times in your lives. Yet what really creates a difference is if you have tried to introduce a change in such repetitive manner of yours.
On social media, the behaviour of people towards others becomes completely based upon their level of intelligence. This is because they want to quantify all that they see according to what is right in their books. The amount of space needed for people posting on social media or generate material depends greatly on how well-liked they are in society.
These days, people choose to be inconsiderate about other people’s feelings which makes it difficult for those who are on the radar to survive judgments of the former. Some comments and likes, might just make it a better day for someone because that person might feel loved seeing the number of likes. There is a big difference in seeking validation and seeking peace from one particular thing. But both of them involve expectations. Both these traits carry their own level of harm that they cause to our minds, once they become deeply rooted.
All of us have had several problems in our lives that have caused us to be the kind of people we are today. This is indicative of the fact that the experiences we have had make us what we are. Consequently, many of our experiences among our childhood years, as stated by Freud, go deep down into our unconscious mind that makes it difficult to get those thoughts and cognitions out. We must take into account the fact that some of us encounter circumstances and interact with others that leave us open to outside judgment. Certain people, even reveal that they find it difficult for themselves to work without having appreciation coming from some particular people around us or those who hold higher authority over them.
What makes it even more messed up is that such people. When on social media, become completely depressed when people start pushing them away or ‘trolling’ them. Due to the fact that for some probable reasons like them being less beautiful or being less attractive. We forget that such situations make a person. Who is already vulnerable to such comments from his/her followers. Subject to a lot of mental health issues and a grave danger of having a mental disorder too.
This entire subject of discussion does not carry a lot of significance. Since, when served with entertainment, people have remained concerned with all the negative that goes on behind the screens and are least interested in the positive. This magnifies the negativity that the people on such platforms are introduced to. The youth today is simply expecting people to call their content ‘worthy of attention’. Which is making it difficult for everyone to get into this hall of fame.
Expecting something leads to a lot of degradation of positivity and self-loathing. That is where the problem starts. When a person starts thinking about how well she/he is, the person starts detaching from his/her reality. It a very difficult state of mind and it makes a person drown into thoughts of deteriorating calm and self-doubt. When someone does not live up to our expectations, it becomes difficult for us to bear the fact that that person is not going to fulfil what we in our minds wanted him/her to do. We didn’t make it plain to them what we expected of them.
What we express is a flawed concept in the Indian society, because here the parents have a rigid mentality where they think that what they say shall be imposed on their children. Parents think that schools provide kids the information they need, but education really just means knowing your world and knowing the difference between good and evil. Well, you might be amazed to read this, because Psychology says that there is nothing as right or wrong, and if it exists, then it truly does, provided it has been proven.
Education is the process of gaining an insight or practical knowledge of the world and its dynamics. Nevertheless, parents frequently miss this and end up raising their own kids to be reliant on outside approval. Unknowingly limiting their children’s potential, parents continually seek approval for every activity. Parents may drive their children to the brink of exhaustion till they achieve if they don’t receive a medal. The child’s parents will probably be proud of them if they achieve.In order to make the best decisions in challenging circumstances that call for high-order judgement abilities. Children must have a mental flexibility that allows them to distinguish between good and wrong.
Children have a different approach towards life due to their upbringing, free of dependence. They are dependent on their parents’ opinions in their initial years, which can make them reliant on guidance. This dependence can lead to problems when seeking validation. Technology has further complicated matters, making it difficult for children to know whom to consult. Coping with social life in the age of technology requires new skills. Where we stand and where we head towards, is what defines us and our thoughts.
The idea of anticipating is incorrect since no one in our world has ever received something just by expecting it. While individuals tend to make this mistake, people who expect certain other people to live up to their expectations in terms of the kind of social life they have, is very much a contributor to the current state of the youth in our country, talking in the context.Our lives revolve around what we want them to be, influenced by our needs, and taken down by our wants. Similarly, the kind of expectations we keep from others and how we want them to behave makes it difficult for them to survive around us too.
By expecting people to behave in certain ways, somewhat based on the social protocol, we make them subject to a lot of suffering that is internal and that remains dormant until it has reached a destructive stage. With the exception of the person’s closest allies, no one else can accomplish much in such a circumstance. The main reason why people are having issues these days is because of a serious loss of empathy among all of us. The best treatment for such a person is to try their best to see a therapist that can heal the person from the root to the epithelium and make it all better.
Expectations are a façade, thus we should keep them away from people who actually reflect the reason for our being. Taking things seriously is right, but if we do that 24×7, it might just kill the aura we have cultivated and what we have processed ourselves to develop into. I would request everyone to treat lightly with whomsoever they feel is not up to the mark. How we never what insecurities and state of mind a person might carry at a given point of time. Try and ease it out instead of making it even more difficult for someone. It can heal others. A hand that reaches out can truly do wonders.
For those who feel they would drown into their insecurities, always carry a hope to do what is in your capacity and try bringing your best out. The outcome and appreciation are the results that matter only if we let them influence us. Tread lightly with yourself and do not become harsh just because you did not succeed this time. It not the end of this world and there is nothing like a failure. If you learn from falls, and remember the heights, you shine bright
