Psychology Behind Divorce

While the recent rumours of Divorce amidst Virendra Sehwag and his wife Aarti after 2 decades of marriage has shocked netizens, it is interesting to know why divorces actually happen. We no more live in a world where divorces is something truly hard to get. When we hear the term divorce, the first thought that often comes to mind is the legal separation between partners. While divorce is indeed a legal process that involves formalities such as the division of assets, custody arrangements, and official documentation, it is essential to recognize that it also entails significant psychological factors that often go unnoticed or overlooked. These psychological factors play a vital role not only during the process of divorce but also in shaping the emotional aftermath for both individuals involved.

The emotional toll, such as feelings of betrayal, loss, guilt, or even relief, can be profound, affecting one’s mental well-being for years to come. Understanding and addressing these psychological aspects is crucial, as they have a far-reaching impact on the recovery process and future relationships.

Psychological factors are not only crucial in the context of divorce but also play a foundational role in building and maintaining strong relationships in general. Much like how a person can’t legally drive a vehicle without a proper license, you cannot expect to cultivate a healthy, sustainable relationship without a deep understanding of the psychological factors at play. It is not just the legal processes that need attention, but also the psychological groundwork that needs to be laid, nurtured, and maintained in order to foster lasting and fulfilling relationships.

Psychological Factors behind Divorces

Lack of Communication: 

Lack of communication is a major factor in relationship challenges. It can occur due to many reasons, such as busy lifestyles, fear of conflict, insecurity, or emotional barriers. These reasons can create obstacles that prevent partners from openly sharing their feelings, thoughts, and concerns. In some cases, the pressures of daily life and responsibilities may make it difficult to find time for meaningful conversations.

In other cases, individuals may avoid communication out of fear of starting an argument or due to a lack of confidence in expressing themselves. If there is a lack of communication, there are many chances that it will lead to unnecessary conflicts, frustration, and emotional disconnection. Without regular and open communication, misunderstandings can arise, and minor issues that could have been easily addressed can quickly escalate into bigger problems.

Lack of Emotional Support: 

In relationships, emotional support is a required and essential element. Emotional support includes understanding, care, empathy, and validation—things that one needs from their partner to feel secure and valued. When this emotional support is present, it fosters a deep sense of connection, trust, and mutual respect between partners. However, the lack of emotional support can have a major impact. It can make a person feel isolated, unappreciated, or emotionally neglected, which over time can turn into an unhealthy relationship dynamic.

The absence of empathy and understanding can create a void, leaving one partner feeling unsupported and invisible. As a result, the partner begins to feel increasingly distant from their significant other, leading to feelings of loneliness and emotional disconnect. This emotional withdrawal can escalate into a major relationship issue, where the lack of support creates barriers to communication and intimacy.

Early marriages: 

When two individuals get married at a young age, they often face many difficulties in their relationship. At this stage, they are not fully matured, and they may not have enough life experiences to navigate the complexities of marriage effectively. They may still be figuring out their personal identities, values, and future goals. Additionally, they might not have had the chance to achieve their desired goals, such as education, career aspirations, or personal growth, which can lead to feelings of regret and dissatisfaction over time. These unfulfilled dreams can create emotional strain and resentment within the marriage, further complicating the relationship.

In many cases, early marriages occur because of cultural and societal factors, such as family pressure, societal expectations, or a desire to conform to traditional norms, rather than personal readiness or mutual understanding between the partners. The pressure to marry early may overshadow the individual’s personal goals and aspirations, leading them to make a decision that doesn’t align with their true desires. As a result, both individuals may struggle with unmet expectations, lack of personal development, and a sense of being trapped in a situation that doesn’t fulfill them.

Inability to forgive: 

Inability to forgive refers to holding grudges, harboring increased negativity in interactions, constantly blaming, and feeling bitterness towards one’s partner. These factors are all closely correlated with a lack of forgiveness, which can deeply impact the emotional well-being of a relationship. When forgiveness is absent, it prevents individuals from moving forward, causing past mistakes to linger and resurface in every interaction.

This unresolved resentment can lead to frequent misunderstandings and heated arguments, creating a toxic atmosphere in the relationship. The ongoing negativity and blame only serve to reinforce emotional distance between partners, making it difficult to rebuild trust and intimacy.

Excessive control: 

Excessive control refers to manipulative, dominative, and restrictive behavior, where one partner attempts to control the actions, decisions, and freedom of the other. This behavior often manifests through constant monitoring, dictating choices, or undermining the other partner’s autonomy. When one partner tries to control the other, it creates a suffocating environment in the relationship, making the other partner feel trapped, powerless, and undervalued. Over time, this lack of freedom and respect can build trust issues, as one partner may begin to feel that their thoughts and feelings are disregarded or controlled.

Resolving Conflicts Constructively to Prevent Divorce

Clear communication:  

Communication is the key to keeping the connection strong and healthy. It’s very important for the partners to openly communicate their basic  needs, thoughts, feelings and past experiences. Communication can make one feel heard and understood. It can also help to build trust, respect and  understanding among each other. 

Prioritize Emotional Intimacy: 

Partners should always express love and appreciation through small gestures, as this will strengthen the bond and bring happiness to the  relationship. Spending quality time with each other is also very important, it brings joy to the relationship and creates understanding and closeness  among partners. 

Resolve conflict through mutual understanding: 

As clear communication is very important, resolving conflict rather than  holding grudges is also very important. Partners should prioritize their  relationship over fights and conflicts. Instead of pointing out each other’s  past mistakes they should focus on finding the solutions and keep the  relationship happy. This builds trust and respect towards their partner.

Keep the friendship alive: 

Sharing positive experiences, laughter and joyful moments is a core part of  any relationship that should be prioritized. It’s very important to keep the  friendship alive, even after many years of Marriage. Partners should treat  each other with the same kindness, respect, and love as they did in their  starting phase, this maintains the relationship and avoids conflicts. 

Seek help before it’s too late: 

Consult marriage counsellors, they provide therapy for couples  experiencing difficulties in their relationship, it’s very important to seek  help before it becomes too late. Offering help at the right time can prevent  your relationship in many ways and keep your bond alive and healthy. 

Conclusion

Divorce is a complex issue that is beyond legal terms, it involves  psychological factors as well. Various reasons cause divorces but on the  other hand, they can be prevented too. With the proper help of  professionals, a relationship can bloom again, seeking help before it’s too  late can build the relationship in many ways. It’s very important to look  after these factors early on, before the final decision of ‘DIVORCES’. So what do you think? is the cricketer really getting a divorce? or as some people saying “Grey divorce”?

FAQs 

1. How does divorce impact self-esteem? 

Divorce can have a great impact on self-esteem especially if one partner  experiences betrayal or infidelity. Feelings of insecurity, and failure, arise  and an individual question their self-worth. 

2. Can psychological problems lead to divorce? 

Yes, psychological problems can lead to divorce as it can strain the  relationship. If neither partner is trying to communicate it will lead to  emotional breakdowns which will eventually get worse with time and lead  to divorce. 

3. Can divorce have psychological effects on individuals?

Yes, both partners may experience grief, as both were involved in a  relationship before. Divorce can cause stress, anxiety depression and a  sense of loss. 

4. Can divorce be avoided if Psychological issues are addressed early? 

Yes, addressing the psychological factors earlier and seeking help at the  proper time helps the relationship to improve and with the help of this  partners can strengthen their bond and avoid divorces.