How to deal with a Conflict?

A person with a conflict-avoidant personality avoids conflict and arguments at all costs because they worries about upsetting or upsetting other people. Conflict avoidants would do anything to minimize or deny issues to avoid having to have a conversation about them because they have a great fear of disappointing or losing others. Instead of confronting a situation, avoiders willfully ignore it or distance themselves from it. Avoiders don’t seem to give a damn about their problems or other people’s problems. Individuals who avoid the situation either assume others will take responsibility for it or expect it will go away on its own.

Read More: “I am Sorry!”, Why do People Over-apologize?

Tips you can consider to overcome Conflict avoidance:

1. Think about the benefits of conflict:

Reframe how you are viewing conflict. Consider how conflict might be beneficial rather than viewing it as something that will always be harmful. For instance, a disagreement might be a chance for you to communicate your emotions to your partner and become closer. Being vulnerable can enhance emotional closeness by facilitating a deeper understanding between you and your spouse. Additionally, it can make you feel more loved and accepted by your partner. In the job, conflict can assist you in recognizing and resolving issues with your colleagues.

Read More: How to Handle Haters in Your Workplace

2. Build up to it slowly:

Practising saying no in situations with a low risk or starting with conflicts that cause the least anxiety; is a way to gradually increase your comfort level. You might voice your disapproval by pointing out that the barista misread your coffee order or telling your coworker that they should have followed up with you on a crucial matter. Managing these minor affairs with grace but firmness will boost your self-assurance. These circumstances present great chances to hone communication abilities.

Read More: 10 Ways to Build Self-Confidence

3. Confront your fears:

Your what-if ideas may be fueled by your anxiousness.”What if I reinforce a boundary with my boss and they fire me?” is a possible thought. alternatively, “What if I argue with my partner over not remembering our anniversary, and we get into a heated argument?” You may find it challenging to deal with disagreement when you think these things. Alternatively, you might face your anxiety and consider it realistically. One can poke holes in the story you are telling yourself about someone’s reaction and check in on it. Let’s say you would like to remind your supervisor that you don’t return calls for work after 5:00 p.m. You should remind yourself that your supervisor is a sensible person who supports work-life balance if you are afraid that doing so would result in your termination.

Read More: Psychology Behind Fear and Its Impact on People

4. Utilize anxiety-reduction strategies while in dispute:

Many people experience anxiety when they are in conflict. Your nervousness may make you evade or skirt crucial interactions. You can attempt to use anxiety-reduction strategies during conflicts. Before the confrontation, one strategy is to practice deep breathing. You can remind yourself to take deep breaths throughout a fight. Additionally, it’s a good idea to wait to respond. It’s acceptable to say that you need a minute or longer to think things through before answering, Refraining from reacting right away eases the pressure to do so. A pregnant pause also facilitates clearer decision-making.

Read More: How Does Overthinking Impact Our Decision-Making Power?

5. Take counselling into account:

Conflict can be addressed and worked through in therapy. Counselling is recommended to those who shy away from confrontation since it can help you learn how to handle conflict and understand the reasons behind it. Additionally, therapy can benefit you:

• Determine your fears.
• Change the way you think about conflict.
• develop effective communication abilities
• Practice expressing your emotions in words.
• discover coping mechanisms for anxiety

A person with a conflict-avoidant personality avoids conflict and disagreements at all costs because they fear upsetting or upsetting other people, according to the definition of people-pleasing behaviour. Those who avoid conflict usually anticipate a negative response and steer clear of even constructive conflicts in relationships, How can you tell whether you avoid conflicts?

• Deny that there is a problem, be afraid, or refrain from speaking up
• Repress emotions so they don’t burst or turn passive-aggressive later
• laughing a little while in conflict to cool down the situation
• When a disagreement arises, shift the conversation.
• Try to come across as a kind person.
• Refrain from arguing with people, even if you disagree with them inside.

Consequence of Conflict Violence:

Avoiding disagreement can have highly negative effects on a relationship. Two people are not communicating their needs and desires to each other when they avoid conflict. Both parties become resentful and frustrated as a result of this. Instead of conversation, the relationship is now predicated on expectations and presumptions. That may cause a great deal of strife thereafter. As you can see, avoiding confrontation has a bad impact on many aspects of your relationship and may even be harmful to your health. People who suppress their emotions may experience tension, worry, and sadness. Physical issues like high blood pressure and heart disease can also be brought on by suppressed emotions.

Summing Up

People-pleasing conduct such as conflict avoidance usually stems from a deep-seated fear of offending others. Growing up in a dismissive or hypercritical atmosphere is the root cause of many of these characteristics. The act of retreating from or avoiding conflict completely is known as conflict avoidance. This is something that people frequently do out of fear of discomfort, rejection, or hurt. Maybe they’re trying to prevent a fight for dominance. Avoiding conflict can be detrimental to your relationships as well as your mental health. Setting and upholding boundaries can also be challenging when someone exhibits this people-pleasing habit. It is possible to get over the fear of conflict and develop healthy, productive coping mechanisms for when confrontations arise.