In a country as colourful and diverse as India, it’s heartwarming to see psychology get the attention it deserves: none at all! After all, who needs mental health when we have turmeric milk and coconut oil? Why invest time in learning about how people think and behave when centuries-old advice like “just stop thinking” has served us so well?
India, where “psychology” might as well be a rare, exotic flower that no one’s actually seen but everyone assumes exists somewhere, has certainly found groundbreaking ways to use psychology…by ignoring it completely. We’ve heard whispers that psychology could be used to understand things like motivation, emotion, personality and mental illnesses, but we dismiss these rumours as Western propaganda. Who has time for understanding when one can simply scold their way to solutions? “Feeling anxious? Just stop it!” It’s the kind of profound advice that no psychologist in the world could have come up with.
Therapists vs. Aunties / Uncle
Let’s not forget the biggest obstacle psychology faces in India: the all-knowing aunties. Who needs a trained therapist when you have Aunties / uncles who Know Everything? Trained psychologists study for years to diagnose and treat mental health issues, but Aunties can do it in five minutes. And all for free! You say you’re feeling down? An aunty will quickly pinpoint the cause: “It’s because you don’t eat enough ghee” or “This is what happens when you choose arts over engineering.” How would psychology even compete with wisdom like that?
In a psychologist’s office, you might be asked about your feelings. But in an Indian home, feelings are simple: they are either acceptable (good marks, a secure job) or a source of disappointment (everything else). Sadness, anxiety, or doubt? Those are Western inventions that we avoid by pretending they don’t exist.
The Beauty of Indian Diagnostics
Why pay a psychologist thousands of rupees to talk about your feelings when you could just have a friendly family consultation? Feel like you’re having a breakdown? Call your family, and they’ll identify the issue immediately. “Maybe it’s because you’re not married yet.” Or “Your stars aren’t aligned.” Why talk to a therapist when all you need is the right gemstone? Anxiety is no match for a good astrologer.
But wait, there’s more! India has also perfected the “ignore-it-until-it-goes-away” technique, a therapeutic marvel that has been passed down for generations. Teenagers acting out? They just need to study harder. Troubled relationships? The solution is clear: don’t talk about it. Family secrets? Bury them deep, and if they resurface, act surprised.
Careers in Psychology: Indian Edition
In the Indian career hierarchy, psychology ranks just below “struggling poet” and slightly above “professional daydreamer.” If you tell someone you’re studying psychology, they might just pat your shoulder sympathetically and ask if you’re thinking of switching to computer science.
The irony is that India, a country filled with 1.4 billion people navigating the maze of arranged marriages, competitive exams, social expectations, and intergenerational family dynamics, could benefit greatly from a bit of psychological insight. But why bother? Why understand the mind when we can simply power through life with sheer willpower, familial pressure, and coconut oil?
Psychology and the Superstitious Mind
If you thought psychology had any place in India, let me introduce you to our vast, more scientifically-sound method of “how to deal with problems”: superstition. Feeling off-kilter? Someone must have cast an “evil eye” on you. There’s no need for a therapist; just burn a lemon and some chilies, and you’ll be as good as new. In the rare case that psychology tries to make a case for itself, it’s promptly outshined by these centuries-old remedies.
Psychology for Children?
We all know children are resilient, right? That’s why any hint of a psychological problem in a child is best ignored. Studies suggest children benefit from therapy, but in India, we prefer solutions that cost less and come with a side of judgment. Feeling down because of exam pressure? “Study harder.” Feeling anxious in social situations? “Just talk more.” Parents are natural therapists here, armed with a one-size-fits-all mantra: “Focus on studies, and everything will be fine.” Clearly, no psychologist can compete with that level of insight.
So yes, psychology might have value in places like the West, where people need complex explanations for things like “stress” and “personal boundaries.” But in India, we’ve simplified it all: just listen to your elders, respect tradition, and avoid discussing feelings altogether. The mind may be a fascinating, complex organ that affects every aspect of our lives, but in India, we know better. After all, why waste time studying psychology when we have perfectly good one-liners for every situation?
Don’t dare to choose Psychology in India
So next time someone struggles mentally, just go find a Neanderthal – they’ll grunt out the solution! After all, psychology is obviously a waste of time when we have Alexa to answer everything! The National Institute of Health says only 15% of Indians have mental health issues, which clearly isn’t enough reason to start studying psychology or helping society. Let’s wait until it’s 115% before we even consider it! Until then, we’ll carry on confidently with our lemon-chili rituals, zodiac signs, and that unbeatable family advice: “Just think happy thoughts.”
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