We can become better people by improving our relationships. We frequently have the energy to take care of others in ways we wouldn’t take care of ourselves. That is how strong love is. The primary reason for being in a relationship is that they provide the best environment for discovering our unhealed wounds and providing a safe space to address them. Unfortunately, not all relationships end happily; even when two partners have spent enough quality time together, a divorce may still occur.
What Makes a Relationship Unsuccessful?
It is not uncommon to hear divorce news of couples today. Some instances, such as Kritika Khurana (aka, Boho girl) and Aditya Chabbra, Himanshi Teckwani and Rishi Athwani (aka, glam couple), Kusha Kapila and Zorawar, Malvika Sitlani and Akhil Aryan, Samantha and Naga Chaitanya, Dhanush and Aishwarya Rajinikanth, Charu Asopa and Rajiv Sen and many more.
Failure in a relationship is the result of a personal relationship that has broken down, deteriorated, or failed, usually in the context of a romantic or intimate engagement. It covers circumstances where a relationship between two people becomes strained, dysfunctional, or unable to satisfy the demands and expectations of both sides.
While a failed relationship could result in a split, divorce, or separation of the couple. It can also be used to describe connections that still exist, but are no longer healthy or gratifying for the parties involved.
Common causes Of an unsuccessful relationship
Despite the fact that society promotes and frames marriage as bringing happiness, it can also evoke less than rosy feelings. Not everyone who makes a commitment is aware of the obligations that come with it, but they nonetheless choose to start one with irrational hopes. But when they are refuted and conflicts arise, it opens the door to divorce.
1) Love is not enough:
Couples get more at ease with one another as they age, thus their intimate interactions tend to bring out both of their finest and worst qualities. At the same time, contentment shifts away from love and towards quality, status, and general well-being. If partners are not able to attain respect , validation in relationship it usually ends in divorce.
2) Underappreciation:
To be reciprocal, appreciation is essential. The early, unconditional love or “spark” fades if there isn’t confidence, fulfilment, and communication, which opens the door for divorce. The relationship lacks excitement and feelings of being in a “meaningless marriage” emerge if one does not acquire either variable (rewards and expenses). This causes one person to feel ignored and undervalued.
3) Infidelity:
One of the cornerstones of any healthy relationship is trust, which is shattered when someone commits infidelity. Finding out a partner having an extramarital affair can
4) Jealousy:
Jealousy results from a lack of confidence or relational insecurity. Trust concerns have the potential to weaken the basis of a relationship over time, resulting in ongoing arguments and an escalation of undesirable behaviours.
5) Domestic violence:
23.5% of divorce happens due to domestic violence. Domestic violence is violence conducted by any family member, a household or an intimate partner. It has many forms such as physical abuse, mental abuse, or emotional abuse.
6) Lack of intimacy:
Intimacy goes beyond physical intimacy and encompasses emotional, intellectual, and even spiritual connections between partners. It mainly results in emotional disconnection, lack of communication, resentment, and conflict. A lack of physical intimacy leads to feelings of frustration, rejection, and dissatisfaction.
7) Unrealistic expectations:
False, excessive, and unrealistic expectations from life or from the roles of partners are other causes of unhappy marriages.
Psychological Impacts of Unsuccessful Relationships
1) Partners:
The initiator will feel dread, separation, irritation, wrath, doubt, and guilt, which causes separation and encourages blaming and fault-finding. The receiver will feel shocked, betrayal, loss of control, mistreatment, diminished self-esteem, insecurity, rage, and want to “get revenge” as well as a desire to settle down.
2) Women:
Women have a superior system for self-adjustment than men. The reasons for this include the fact that women are more sensitive to marital discord, feel relief after divorce, rely on social support networks, and have high self-esteem for their new roles. However, divorced women endure social stigma more than divorced.
2) Men:
Men will have a better replacement system men remarry more quickly if they have enough time, and they will be more committed to the new couple’s relationship to save the new marriage. The psychological impacts such as loneliness, social isolation, and anxiety are for a shorter run.
3) Children:
Children’s psychological effects are influenced by three things: how well families get along, how much and how long conflicts last inside families, and how well children are cared for after divorce. Children who thrive after a divorce have strong personalities and sufficient wisdom.
Boys will be less academically and socially adjusted, more likely to express their anger in public, and lastly, more likely to become frustrated and damage themselves. Boys are more likely to argue with their parents and classmates in school. Girls, on the other hand, often internalise their distress, but they also tend to experience greater despair, migraines, and stomach aches, as well as alterations in their eating and sleeping habits.
Role Of Social Media In Influencing Relationships
Couples may spend more time creating a “image” of who they are rather than concentrating on the relationship itself as a result of social media, which can lead to unhealthy comparisons and irrational expectations about what relationships should be like.
- Reels: Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, and YouTube have a mechanism to highlight short videos. They highlight the best moments of people’s lives, including their relationships. They emphasize only the positive aspects while downplaying the challenges. This creates unrealistic ideals and dissatisfaction among the couples watching them.
- Relationship Goals and Expectations: Many trends, including relationship goals that uphold particular principles and customs, are encouraged by social media. Couples could experience stress from having to meet these standards. The relationships are put through needless stress and strain as a result.
- Fear of missing out (FOMO): Social media highlights relationship milestones and adventures. Constant exposure to these posts can lead to an individual questioning the excitement and fulfillment in their own relationships.
Divorce among social media influencers can have a significant impact on teenagers:
It can lead to emotional distress among them. They might feel a sense of disappointment, sadness, or confusion about what true love is. It can lead to uncertainty and fear in teenagers regarding their own future relationships. They may question the stability and longevity of romantic partnerships. A divorce can challenge teenagers’ perceptions of what a ‘PERFECT’ relationship looks like. It is always important for teenagers to understand that influencers’ lives are not always representative of reality.
Rebuilding And Moving Foreword
Getting over a divorce is definitely not easy. But here are some steps that can help to rebuild one’s life, which can vary from person to person:
- Acknowledge and process emotions
- Seek social support
- Take care of your physical health
- Speak Appropriately to your children
- Be kind to yourself by engaging in mindful practices
- Seek professional help if needed
- Rediscover what makes you happy & Establish a routine.
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